the utterly random magazine
We were going to write about the fact that the shooter who killed four people in a school in France is thought to have videotaped the incident, but it just isn’t that kind of Tuesday, so we decided to post one of our favorite videos instead.
We can’t exactly put our finger on what is so funny about this guy, we just know he makes us lofao. Enjoy.
Happy Saturday! While most Miamians are probably still hung over or in bed from last night at the club, some might be out and about looking for ways to engage in their community! As part of my campaign to promote community using Craigslist as a resource, here’s more good and cool stuff I found on Craigslist!
Date: 2012-01-06, 10:10PM EST
Reply to:
heading to malls etc…
Thank ya
Date: 2012-01-04, 5:42PM EST
Reply to:
Stop illegal foreclosures in Miami and show your support against corrupt judges at the Miami Court House located at 73 West Flagler Street, Miami, FL on 01/05/2012 Thursday 10am to 2pm
If you have been foreclosure on or are facing foreclosure call 786 375 5294
Miami's 99%, Image by Jupiter Firelyte
Charity Sapphire is a writer, journalist, publicist, stunt fighter, and all around performer. Miss Sapphire has lent her skills to projects and organizations including Vagina Monologues, Alternative Breaks, and Shakespeare in the Park Miami. She is currently News Editor for Arketipo187.com and stunt fighting with Urban Ronin. She makes her bread and butter as the communications coordinator for Meditab, a large medical software company based in the US. This year Miss Sapphire received her B.S. in Mass Communications from Florida International University. When she is not generating content and social networking for Arketipo187.com and Meditab, she is at home with her boyfriend and mutt.Oh the joy of community! Lately, I’ve been trying to revamp Craigslist’s image by finding actually good and useful stuff instead of creepy, fishy, and scammer stuff. I was doing pretty good, but then I found this:
Date: 2011-12-30, 6:17PM EST
I’m currently taking the class at first I was doing ok, but now I’m having problems with it. Looking for someone to take the last three quizzes and my last test. ———– txt only. Feel free to txt me at anytime. Need someone asap I need to pass my class. I can pay $80 for all and you don’t have to be in Florida I can paypal you the money. I just need a minimum of a B on each, but preferably an A of course on the rest of the assignments. I have a quiz due today at 11:59 pm so txt me asap for the login info.
Charity Sapphire is a writer, journalist, publicist, stunt fighter, and all around performer. Miss Sapphire has lent her skills to projects and organizations including Vagina Monologues, Alternative Breaks, and Shakespeare in the Park Miami. She is currently News Editor for Arketipo187.com and stunt fighting with Urban Ronin. She makes her bread and butter as the communications coordinator for Meditab, a large medical software company based in the US. This year Miss Sapphire received her B.S. in Mass Communications from Florida International University. When she is not generating content and social networking for Arketipo187.com and Meditab, she is at home with her boyfriend and mutt.
As part of my new goal to back up my statement “Craigslist is a good source for quality items at extremely low cost and it also provides a way for the community to connect whether it be through posting events, fairs, jobs, or personals…” I have begun to actively seek postings that fit the criteria. Last week Craigslist boasted some fun activities for women in the South Florida area.
For last week’s post click here.
This week, I’m proud to report that there are some community programs for youth, some part time jobs for starving artists, and finally, someone who wants a “Smart person to hang out with.”
In Homestead, youth and adults can enjoy a Winter Martial Arts camp (Dec. 19 through Jan. 3). “Visit Us At 250 East palm Drive Suite 357, Florida City, Florida, 33034
or Call At 786-385-5041 For More Information!”
In Miami’s art district, an established artist with his own gallery in PA asks for an Artist’s Assistant.
Date: 2011-12-17, 9:31AM EST
Reply to: gigs-8g2vw-2757589841@craigslist.org
Date: 2011-12-15, 1:07AM EST
Reply to: comm-zpdhc-2754020461@craigslist.org
By smart I mean Mensa level or above, but if you are like me, new here, a non-smoking knowledgeable culture vulture with a lot of energy and humor and enthusiasm and warmth your IQ could take second place! It’s very hard to find people here I have anything in common with. I know a lot of people here feel the same. This is not about sex, money or the sandbox syndrome (“Mine is bigger than yours”). Any age, gender, but be genuine, please!
After last week’s morbid and depressing TFCL column, I realized we have nearly reached the pinnacle of darkness in Craigslist. TFCL started with a simple foot fetish joke to eventually uncovering the darkest type of poster… murderers.
Craigslist is a place where the community can gather and it does such a good job with that, it’s not fair to label it as a murderous organization due to the few people out of the hundreds of thousands (at least) who use Craigslist for disgusting purposes.
This week, in the South Florida area, there is opportunity for women to find something good on Craigslist. From a yoga partner to body painting, South Florida women can expect to find something other than scams on Craigslist this weekend!
First up, a young lady would like to begin learning yoga. She posted it in the proper category (activity partners) and I hope another decent, honest person joins her in her quest.
Date: 2011-12-08, 11:06AM EST
Looking for someone to regularly pratice yoga with.
namastee
Next up, a woman who has worked hard to lose weight and get in shape would like to offer her personal help and tips to other people for relatively free. Her fare is so low, I think she might only request it to buy the supplement pills she provides. Enjoy:
Date: 2011-12-08, 10:51PM EST
Lose weight with a woman who has lost weight with this program!
Lose 8-15 pounds by the new year.
Low exercise, and strengthen your metabolism.
Monthly Rates as low as $10 a week. Negotiations are welcomed!
For $3 more a week you’ll get 3 months of organic supplements to help you slim down.
Weekly rates include:
-Personalized exercise program for your schedule.
-Personalized meal plan.
-Motivational texts/calls.
-Someone available to speak with everyday and help you stay on track.
Monthly rates include:
All of the above plus energy drinks that have 0 carbs and 0 sugar. Or meal replacement shakes.
Please note negotiations are welcome, I understand everyone is on a budget so please let me know what’s best for you and we can work it out.
Have a great day and let’s kick butt together! : )
Have someone to personally help you with your nutritional and exercise needs!
And finally, one for my freaks out there:
Date: 2011-12-09, 8:40PM EST
Details:
I have multiple times available on Sunday and weekday ,Monday and Tusday. Here are some painting themes I’m working on: re-creation: corsett/lingerie, Asian kimonos and dragons, Swimwear and more.
FANTASY WOMAN ” BORIS VALLEJO”
http://arturhernadi.com/Art/Art_M.htm
http://arturhernadi.com/Art/boris_vallejo_psylocke.jpg
Please send a pics and information
www.myphotofl.com
http://www.modelmayhem.com/669960
LOCATION
Home studio
COMPENSATION
TFP. You get a copy of the edited pic.
ESCORT
Want to bring one? No problem. If it is a female escort, then perhaps she can pose for as
Photo by Christina Kaouni
Charity Sapphire is a writer, journalist, publicist, stunt fighter, and all around performer. Miss Sapphire has lent her skills to projects and organizations including Vagina Monologues, Alternative Breaks, and Shakespeare in the Park Miami. She is currently News Editor for Arketipo187.com and stunt fighting with Urban Ronin. She makes her bread and butter as the communications coordinator for Meditab, a large medical software company based in the US. This year Miss Sapphire received her B.S. in Mass Communications from Florida International University. When she is not generating content and social networking for Arketipo187.com and Meditab, she is at home with her boyfriend and mutt.
This week I’m turning this over to what other people have found on Craigslist. As my Facebook friends have been reading my articles, they’ve been turning my attention to the darker side of Craigslist. Things like murder, robbery, and straight up con careers. It’s not the intention of this column to bash Craigslist. It would be hypocritical of me to do so when I use it so often. However, recent cases about Craigslist have hit home with what’s happening in America.
Image from the AP
The NYTimes pieced together the story of down-on-their-luck men and their “too good to be true” new job that they found on Craigslist. Unfortunately, three of those men were found buried in spots across Ohio. The fourth managed to escape and alerted authorities. One of the men left three children behind. The killers were a man and his young friend. They pretended to own farm land and hired the men to “feed some cows”. The job sounded simple, relaxing, and paid better than being a delivery man at Dominoes (where the father of three worked, but couldn’t make ends meet).
To think that people could use this down economy to prey upon their own countrymen is truly eye-opening. This country was raised hard, by tough people, and in the state of competition and ambition that they reared this country, it’s citizens can never go soft. We can never fully trust in each other. Precautions must be made.
Earlier this summer I was complaining that the jobs I found on Craigslist paid nothing close to what they advertised. Thinking back on it now, I shudder to think that I should be grateful that at least they didn’t kill me.
The other story that was turned over to me is of a long-time con artist who used Craigslist to find her victims. Journalists who have reported on the case turn the story into something of a fable, lamenting on the woman’s designer clothes, well-groomed/well-mannered persona, her charisma. All of that is not was should characterize Hope Ballantyne. She is a grimy, disgusting, lying, manipulating, leech who has forever harmed the community of San Francisco’s faith in humanity.
She preyed upon people she connected with. The more she enjoyed your friendship, the more she would steal from you later (anywhere from $200 to well over $5,000). An ex-roommate, the woman who began the movement to spread awareness about “Hurricane Hope”, found spiral-bound notebooks filled with social security numbers, credit card numbers, mother’s maiden names… this bitch Ballantyne really had her act together. Radiolab turned her story into some kind of love-affair between “normal people” and pathological liars. As amusing as it was to hear people from Hope’s past speak of her with a heartbroken tinge over every word, it was overall aggravating. They seem to have the same reluctance to pursue her as the authorities do. Apparently, bounced checks and never paying back borrowed money isn’t high on their priority list (wish the government felt the same way about student loans!). This case remains unresolved.
Before we part, ladies in Deerfield Beach, FL, PLEASE don’t move in with this guy!!
Date: 2011-12-01, 10:51PM EST
Reply to:
D'awwww he even added a Christmas tree to his ad! What a guy!
Charity Sapphire is a writer, journalist, publicist, stunt fighter, and all around performer. Miss Sapphire has lent her skills to projects and organizations including Vagina Monologues, Alternative Breaks, and Shakespeare in the Park Miami. She is currently News Editor for Arketipo187.com and stunt fighting with Urban Ronin. She makes her bread and butter as the communications coordinator for Meditab, a large medical software company based in the US. This year Miss Sapphire received her B.S. in Mass Communications from Florida International University. When she is not generating content and social networking for Arketipo187.com and Meditab, she is at home with her boyfriend and mutt.
This week’s trend: scammer microsites.
I’ve been stalking Craigslist for a few years now. By the time my first “The Things I Find on Craigslist” column was published, I’d browsed through thousands of ads. Craigslist is a good source for quality items at extremely low cost (like the suede futon I purchased a few weeks back) and it also provides a way for the community to connect whether it be through posting events, fairs, jobs, or personals.
Unfortunately, there are those among us who like to scam. A good chunk of Craigslist users (posters AND responders) are scammers. I’ve noted time and time again that Craigslist users should be wary of ads that are continuously reposted. It’s important to note if there is a trend in the pattern. Weeks back I spotted a foot fetishist posting ads for foot models. The fishy part was that he wanted the pics sent to his cell phone. Any respectable agent would want professional, high quality shots. Not cellphone shots! As the days passed the ads grew more and more desperate. He finally started offering compensation (“offering” if they qualified… but what was there for the girls to “qualify” for?).
Needless to say, Craigslist can be both wondrous and dangerous. So naturally, I browse with caution. This morning, while browsing for my usual stuff (cash money gigs), I came across a posting trend with some clever titles.
First, I see the title “Transportation creating”. The ad doesn’t give anymore detail, but it does provide a link to a website. The site is “Zantastik.com” and the section is “Rewarder”. Here is what the poster meant when he said “Transportation creating”…
At first, I disregarded this. Obviously, helping a college grad make connections with huge companies like Lockheed Martin is not “Transportation creating”. I was thinking more like carpooling or cab driving. It’s no news to me that scammers are posting on Craigslist, but just because they’re getting more clever with their microsites doesn’t mean it’s good enough to make my TFCL (Things I Find on Craigslist) column!
But then… I saw the title “offspring diagnosis”. Immediately, I assume some first-time parent is seeking healthcare for their child on Craigslist. This worries me, so I open the posting. I see the same link “Zantastik”. Before I followed the link I decided to Google this site and found that it yields no results (on GOOGLE)!
After reading:
“This is a faily simple job, but it requires some clever tracking. There is good pay if you are able to help make this succeed.
I have to (HAVE TO) check out this site. And lo’ and behold, I find the story of a girl who has been searching for her father for 18 years. Her mother and father separated and the poor dear was forced to move to another city and has since never been able to locate her father. Mind you, they live within the same state (for all 18 years!) and the girl looks about 17… oh well, you’ll have to see it for yourself!
This is exactly why people shouldn’t toke on their lunch break:
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. The Japanese are fucking weird.
Last week I picked on a foot fetishist who had blown up Craigslist’s “Gigs” section begging for girls to let him or her rub their feet. Since I don’t want anyone to feel like I have a bias against foot fetishists, this week I found something particularly unusual.
A college student is in need of someone to turn the pages of their textbook while they disable the nerves in their spinal cord and induce paralysis.
Talk about time management. The ad is unclear whether this procedure is a necessary medical treatment, but I would assume if someone had to become paralyzed for an indefinite amount of time, that they would want to sleep or watch tv… not read a course textbook.
I have to commend the student’s dedication. However, when the poster asks for people with attitudes to not apply, he or she displayed tons of attitude. I would recommend sweet girls who have big hearts for the disabled to not apply. For one, it’s unclear if this guy (or girl) has a fetish for reading economics textbooks while under self-induced paralysis. For two, if this person is scaring away people who might want clear answers on topics such as “When will this be over?” and the poster refuses to answer, this might not be a job for the meek or easily dominated.
Freaks like this require special handling. Enjoy the post:
